Sunday, November 2, 2014

modern family

We like to think that we are 'with the times', open minded, that sort of thing. Every and any topic is up for discussion at our home- as many a (former) teen may remember from joining us at the dinner table.

The straight-gay continuum is nothing foreign to us. We've encouraged our threesome to follow their dreams/passion, regardless of prospects and societary expectations. My love and I have tried to model free thinking and expressing-

There were limits to our tolerance though. Our kids were not allowed any type of piercing or tattoo beyond the -within acceptable societary norms- ear piercings until they were 18 years old and therefore deemed adults and responsible for their own decisions. Just because, we do not like those things. Yep, no other reason.

Although it came as no surprise (after all, she asked for a navel piercing when she was 4 or 5 yrs old), Vera finally got an official piercing last year- not the navel, not the lip or the eyebrow (all previous wishes) but her septum. Even though she was aware that  my love and I were not fans of that sort of thing, she asked what we thought. And what to say? At least it was not anything permanently damaging our beautiful girl.

Picture by Carol Persons
Accompanying her recently to a tattoo shop in town to pick out new septum jewelry was a novel experience - I felt honored though, that she valued my opinion and that we looked at the options together.

While there, she also showed me the work of a tattoo artist she liked, for another one of her long time wishes...this one definitely the permanent mark that we had hoped to avoid. These are the moments  I struggle with. I dislike tattoos, simply because I don't like the look, I don't understand why someone would like having an image inked in their skin. That is the only reason, it is not against my values really...but this is my little girl. Sigh.

So she got what she wished for, and as far as 'tats' go, this one is very well done. Again, Vera asked for our opinion. So I told her- honesty being one of our values also. In the end, my love knew the best response of all, and the truest one: I love you, no matter what.

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