signs

Even I am looking for signs of spring. Longing for more sunshine. Thinking about those days when we can open the windows and feel a warmer breeze.

At work, changes are ongoing- prompting a lot of reflection. Two amazing women have left our team. Part of my sadness about this is completely selfish- I would have liked to grow more, to be challenged more, under their management. They know me so well. Part of it is sadness for the larger workplace, which now has to operate without their tireless advocacy and passionate wisdom. Part of it is for them, because when you have poured heart and soul into something for so long and there is abrupt and painful parting, it brings so many questions. Which leads me back to my own questions about what happened- if these women, whom I admire so much, who are my role models, if they had to leave for whatever reason, am I working at a place where I should want to work? What does it mean, what are the signs telling us?

So as a team, we pull together. Thankfully. Some of my co-workers are giving a fierce voice to all our feelings, worries, thoughts. I am thankful for that as well, for even in writing words fail me to describe.

Moving forward, we have to. Training the kittens to be outside and come in when we call. They are both giving me so much joy, I was wondering if I could get my health insurance to cover the costs of upkeep since they are clearly very good for bringing my blood pressure down.

My love and my girls have been tremendously supportive. Keeping it together at work and then coming home and having the luxury of falling apart surrounded by them is priceless and made me think of these wise words :

I am going to be fine. Because I can still live and work by my professional code of ethics, which includes the  values service, social justice, dignity and worth of the person, importance of human relationships, integrity, and competence.

And today the sun is shining. And I have some time for reflection (and blogging). And the kittens did come when we called. 

crystal ball

I'm smiling at my girl Vera right now, who is doing some wishful talking about when she is moving to the big city. Listing household items she will most likely need. Details I am not quite ready to think about just yet.

My girl Emma is dreaming further away, to over the ocean, for her moving wishes. And how do you feel about that, asked my friend Caroline. Details I am not at all ready to feel anything about at the moment.

I know it is coming, that much I can tell.

no, not my picture, found it on tumblr

At work there are uncertain times. At home, we are getting closer to decisions about the shape and place of the future. I got a car that makes me officially not a soccer mom anymore according to Vera. The kittens are practicing going outside and do not listen at all. The weather is up and down. All kinds of changes and nothing new. I am not trying to speak in riddles- this is just the daily jumble. And sometimes I wish that I could predict the future, just a little bit, and sometimes I don't, because after all, things have turned out pretty well up to now.

wintry winter

Got up a wee bit early this morning due to being back-up for the brave after-hours/weekend people at the hospital. And although I don't like getting up early, I do like being up early. I love to watch the view out my dining room window slowly turning bleaker. I love having time to sip my coffee while contemplating the news and the day ahead.

The trouble with weekend is, and I may have said this before, that the anticipation is usually the best part. Because when I get there, all that relaxing that I was planning to do, the knitting and the quilting and the walking with my love...all that takes a back seat to house hold chores and whatever else is popping up (such as car shopping).

The kittens are growing big- and if only the weather was not so wintry we would have them practice going outdoors and climbing trees instead of the furniture or our pant legs. As it is, all five felines are suffering a bit with the cabin-fever.

My love has awoken and is making more coffee. That will get my day really started.

Happy weekend!